The 8 Traits Of Successful People ~ Lorraine C. Ladish

In order to turn small achievements into a solid foundation on which to build your life you need to develop the qualities of a successful person.

Many people say they want to write a book or run a marathon and some even try. But when faced with the first difficulty — writer’s block, a rejection, an injury, or interference from a toxic person or sheer laziness — they give up.

Those who succeed in publishing a book or running the marathon are the ones who embark on the journey knowing that they need to be committed to the goal, that it won’t always be easy and that they need to do whatever it takes to make it.

A failure, just like a success, is circumstantial. Some people accumulate many failures but they use them as stepping-stones to achievements that lead to one huge success. For instance, Thomas Edison failed numerous times before he invented the light bulb.

Other people pile on achievements but can’t manage to make them lasting or profitable and they soon find themselves again engulfed by failure. For example, someone who lands good jobs but can’t manage to keep any of them.

So far I’ve overcome an eating disorder, faced unemployment, reinvented myself professionally, survived poverty, published a number of books, and come out on top. That does not prevent any of these challenges from happening again, it just makes me feel better prepared to deal with them, should they arise.

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                           Taking the plunge in Haiti © Lorraine C. Ladish

Some of the qualities of successful people:

1. Patience — Don’t expect to see results immediately. If you are a writer and submit your manuscript, get used to waiting weeks, months or even years to see your work published.

2. Perseverance — Be ready to work “in the dark,” without knowing if what you are doing is taking you where you need to go. Trust your instincts, trust yourself and keep on going, no matter what.

3. Resilience — Develop the ability to bounce back from failure, from poverty, unemployment, divorce, bankruptcy, a death in the family, illness — everyone goes through rough patches in life. If you are resilient, you will thrive.

4. Creativity — Be creative in finding solutions to life’s problems. Creativity is not restricted to the arts. Think beyond the “normal” ways of doing things.

5. Adaptability — Be open to change, always. Life is change. It may sound trite, but you need to embrace this. If you hang on to old ways of doing things, you will not be able to go forward.

6. Joy — Of course there will be times in which you will feel sad or depressed. But, exercise the muscle of joy, and you will become a joyful person, even in the direst circumstances.

7. Compassion — Put yourself in other people’s shoes, often. Look at things from their perspective. It will prevent you from blaming and complaining and you will feel empowered.

8. Productivity — Talent is a good thing to have, but if you don’t produce, nothing will happen. Don’t wait for things to happen: make them happen.

[This post originally ran on Viva Fifty!}

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lorraine-c-ladish/traits-of-successful-people_b_8907288.html

Serena Williams Takes On Body-Shaming Haters In Powerful Speech ~ Juliet Spies-Gans

ANDY KROPA/INVISION/AP

Speaking at the Sports Illustrated “Sportsperson of the Year” ceremony held in her honor on Tuesday night, Serena Williams addressed the body-shaming that she has had to face and overcome throughout her career, emphasizing just how important internal acceptance is when seeking external success.

“I’ve had people look down on me, put me down because I didn’t look like them — I look stronger,” she said in her acceptance speech. “I’ve had people look past me because the color of my skin, I’ve had people overlook me because I was a woman, I’ve had critics say I [would] never win another Grand Slam when I was only at number seven — and here I stand today with 21 Grand Slam titles, and I’m still going.”

Williams continued, spending much of her time onstage addressing the difficult ride she’s had and the self-confidence that has been necessary to ignore the naysayers and achieve greatness.

The trek to get to this stage and this moment of her career was not easy. “I’ve lived through tragedies and controversies and horses,” she said, the latter being a not-so-subtle reference to the recent debate as to whether she or the Triple Crown winner American Pharoah was more deserving of the “Sportsperson of the Year” title. But now, looking back, Williams explained that each and every one of these emotional and physical hurdles, these internal and external struggles, led her to that podium in New York City on Tuesday night, making history as the first individual woman in more than three decades to earn the crown of “Sportsperson of the Year.”

“For all the ladies out there, yes we can do it,” she said. “My hope by winning this award [is that I] can inspire many, many, many more women … to stand right here on this podium and accept another ‘Sportsperson of the Year,’ so yes ladies it can be done.

“In 1984 in Compton is where I began my journey of becoming a tennis player on beaten down courts,” she said. “Now 30 years later, I still have goals and still have dreams of winning, and this award actually makes me want to work harder to reach more goals.”

 

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/serena-williams-sportsperson-year-ceremony-speech_56717235e4b0dfd4bcbffcbf?cps=gravity_5059_8838454937509328915

 

How to Be in a Romantic Relationship ~ Emily V. Gordon And Ana Hinojosa

http://www.rookiemag.com/2015/10/how-to-be-in-a-romantic-relationship/

Depression Slideshow: Tips for Exercise, Diet and Stress Reduction ~ WebMD

Young thoughtful woman, indoors

Tips for Recovering From Depression

If you’ve had depression, you know how hopeless you can feel. It’s important to get professional treatment. But there are things you can do to ease symptoms of depression. Exercise, changing your diet, and even playing with a pet can improve your mood. Click to the next slide to see how you can start regaining control of your life.

 
 

Woman sitting with dog on jetty, rear view

Let Your Pet Nuzzle Blues Away

Sometimes your pet really can be your best friend — and that’s good therapy. When you play with your pet, you take your mind off your problems. Also, when you take care of your pet you’re fulfilling a commitment to something outside yourself. Caring for others can be very therapeutic.

 
 

Young woman at table with plate of food, smiling

Eat Smart to Lift Mind and Body

There’s a connection between mind and body. Although there is no specific diet that works for depression, a healthy diet can be part of an overall treatment plan. Build your diet around plenty of fruits, vegetables, and whole grains to help boost your physical and emotional health.

 
 
 

Salmon fillet with spinach and lemon wedge

Choose Foods to Boost Your Mood

Some studies suggest omega-3 fatty acids and vitamin B12 — especially for people for may not get enough of these nutrients — may ease the mood changes that are part of depression. Fatty fish such as salmon, tuna, and mackerel contain omega-3 fatty acids. So do flaxseed, nuts, soybeans, and dark green vegetables. Seafood and low-fat dairy products are sources of B12. Vegetarians who eat no meat or fish can get B12 in fortified cereals, dairy products, and  supplements.

 
 

Fresh popcorn in carton

Try Low-Fat Carbs for a Pick-Me-Up

Serotonin is a brain chemical that enhances your sense of well-being. Carbohydrates raise the level of serotonin in your brain. Low-fat carbs such as popcorn, a baked potato, graham crackers, or pasta are options. Vegetables, fruit, and whole grain options also provide fiber.

 
 

Businessman crushing coffee cup

Drink Less Caffeine to Improve Mood

Do you really need that third cup of coffee? Anxiety can accompany depression. And too much caffeine can make you nervous, jittery, or anxious. While possible links between caffeine and depression haven’t been definitively established, cutting back on caffeinated drinks may help lower your risk of depression and improve sleep. 

 
 
 

Man with headache

Treat Your Aches and Pains

Feelings of depression can be related to pain. Work with your health care team to treat your depression and your pain.

 
 

couple on a treadmill in a gym

Exercise to Change the Way You Feel

For some people, exercise works almost as well as antidepressants. And you don’t have to run a marathon. Just take a walk with a friend. As time goes on, increase activity until you exercise on most days. You’ll feel better physically, sleep better at night, and improve your mood.

 
 

Two men on outdoor basketball court

Choose an Exercise You Enjoy

If you don’t like to run, you won’t last long training for a marathon. But you will stay with a moderate exercise you enjoy. For instance, try walking, golfing without a cart, riding a bike, working in your garden, playing tennis, or swimming. The important thing is to pick something you like. Then you’ll look forward to it and feel better when you do it.

 
 
 

Group of women with instructor in exercise class

Exercise With Others for Support

Staying connected with other people helps overcome the lethargy, exhaustion, and loneliness of depression. Join an exercise group or exercise with a friend. You’ll stay connected. And you’ll have support to help you stay on track!

 
 

Woman opening curtains, looking out window

Be Sure You Get Enough Sunlight

Do you feel more depressed during darker, cold months? You may have seasonal affective disorder, or SAD. SAD is most common in the winter, when there’s less sunlight. SAD can be treated with light therapy or exposure to artificial sunlight, antidepressants, and psychotherapy.

 
 

Woman photographing forest on digital camera

Explore Your Creativity

Painting, photography, music, knitting, or writing in a journal: These are all ways people explore their feelings and express what’s on their mind. Being creative can help you feel better. The goal isn’t to create a masterpiece. Do something that gives you pleasure. It may help you better understand who you are and how you feel.

 
 
 

Man sitting in woods listening to music

Make Time for Mindful Relaxation

Stress and anxiety can increase your depression symptoms and make it harder to recover. Learning to mentally relax can help restore a sense of calm and control. You might consider a yoga or meditation class. Or you could simply listen to soothing music while you take a long, hot bath.

 
 

Group of people lifting wall of unfinished house

Become Actively Involved

Being involved with others can help you regain a sense of purpose. And it doesn’t take much to get started. Try volunteering with a charity. Or join a discussion group at the library or at church. Meeting new people and doing new things will help you feel good about yourself.

 
 

smiling family having a meal at a picnic table

Keep Friends and Family in Your Life

The people who love you want to support you. If you shut them out, they can’t. If you let them in, you’ll feel a lot better. Call a friend and go for a walk. Have a cup of coffee with your partner. You may find it helps to talk about your depression. It feels good to have someone listen.

 
 
 

Young woman sleeping, close-up

Get the Healthy Sleep You Need

Depression interferes with healthy sleep. Some people with depression sleep too much. Others can’t fall asleep easily. As you recover from depression, relearn good sleep habits. Start by going to bed and getting up the same time each day. Use relaxation techniques to help you fall asleep. Healthy sleep makes you feel better physically and mentally.

 
 

Man sitting at bar looking at glass of liquor

Avoid Alcohol and Drugs

Alcohol and drugs can slow or prevent recovery from depression. They can also make your depression worse and interfere with the medicines you take for depression. If you have a problem with substance abuse, ask for help now. You’ll have a far better chance of recovering from depression.

 
 

Female Doctor Talking to Patient

Continue Your Treatment

The steps outlined in these slides may help you feel positive about your life. But alone, they’re not enough. They won’t replace medical treatment or talk therapy. Depression is a serious illness, and it carries a risk of suicide. If you are thinking about suicide, seek help immediately. And never stop or change treatment without discussing it carefully with your doctor.

 

http://www.webmd.com/depression/ss/slideshow-depression-diet-stress-exercise?ecd=wnl_men_100215&ctr=wnl-men-100215_nsl-ld-stry_img&mb=RbO7%2fvTOx1EjKOU4pPXoLChonS%2fH3cwyP02j5xZ6yv4%3d&print=true

30 questions to ask your kid instead of how was your day ~ Sara Goldstein

When I picked my son up from his first day of 4th grade, my usual (enthusiastically delivered) question of “how was your day?” was met with his usual (indifferently delivered) “fine.”

Come on! It’s the first day, for crying out loud! Give me something to work with, would you, kid?

The second day, my same question was answered, “well, no one was a jerk.”

That’s good…I guess.

I suppose the problem is my own. That question actually sucks. Far from a conversation starter, it’s uninspired, overwhelmingly open ended, and frankly, completely boring. So as an alternative, I’ve compiled a list of questions that my kid will answer with more than a single word or grunt. In fact, he debated his response to question 8 for at least half an hour over the weekend. The jury’s out until he can organize a foot race.

Questions a kid will answer at the end of a long school day:

  1. What did you eat for lunch?
  2. Did you catch anyone picking their nose?
  3. What games did you play at recess?
  4. What was the funniest thing that happened today?
  5. Did anyone do anything super nice for you?
  6. What was the nicest thing you did for someone else?
  7. Who made you smile today?
  8. Which one of your teachers would survive a zombie apocalypse? Why?
  9. What new fact did you learn today?
  10. Who brought the best food in their lunch today? What was it?
  11. What challenged you today?
  12. If school were a ride at the fair, which ride would it be? Why?
  13. What would you rate your day on a scale of 1 to 10? Why?
  14. If one of your classmates could be the teacher for the day who would you want it to be? Why?
  15. If you had the chance to be the teacher tomorrow, what would you teach the class?
  16. Did anyone push your buttons today?
  17. Who do you want to make friends with but haven’t yet? Why not?
  18. What is your teacher’s most important rule?
  19. What is the most popular thing to do at recess?
  20. Does your teacher remind you of anyone else you know? How?
  21. Tell me something you learned about a friend today.
  22. If aliens came to school and beamed up 3 kids, who do you wish they would take? Why?
  23. What is one thing you did today that was helpful?
  24. When did you feel most proud of yourself today?
  25. What rule was the hardest to follow today?
  26. What is one thing you hope to learn before the school year is over?
  27. Which person in your class is your exact opposite?
  28. Which area of your school is the most fun?
  29. Which playground skill do you plan to master this year?
  30. Does anyone in your class have a hard time following the rules?

 

https://medium.com/synapse/30-questions-to-ask-your-kid-instead-of-how-was-your-day-26be75072f13

Why You Shouldn’t Skip a Workout by Laurice Rawls

Your favorite workout pants are dirty in the hamper, your iPod is on 3%, and your bestie just texted asking you to join her at happy hour. We all have those days where getting to your workout feels more difficult than the actual exercise. So we reached out to Franci Cohen, a board certified personal trainer, nutritionist, and the creator of a cardio resistance workout, to get the scoop on why you should listen to that little voice in your head telling you to get out there and sweat.

You Have A Cold

Running on the treadmill with a runny nose isn’t ideal but, it’s possible a good workout session could help you get rid of your cold. “Working out when you have a cold can actually be beneficial. It can boost immunity, and allow you to rid yourself of the invading bug a lot faster by flushing it out of the body by increased perspiration, respiration, and urination,” says Cohen.

You Missed Your Workout Class

Missing Zumba class may feel like grounds to head home and hop in bed early, but use this opportunity to try something new. Catch the late cycling class or try mixing up your own workout routine. Still sad you missed Zumba? Turn on Spotify’s Zumba playlist (yes, it exists) and create your own routine.

Your iPod Is Dead / You Forgot Your Headphones

Music can be a great exercise buddy, but forgetting your headphones isn’t a sign to go home. Try thinking of all the reasons why you started this journey and how far you’ve come. Instead of throwing in the towel (literally and figuratively), use this time to clear your mind and focus on each muscle you are working on.

You Can’t Find the Time

A wise person once said, “You and Beyoncé both have the same 24 hours. So no excuses.” Okay, so maybe you don’t have the access to trainers, dieticians, and specialty fitness routines like Beyoncé, but think of exercise as an investment in yourself. Some alone time to relieve stress and clear your head goes a long way.

Cohen suggests getting a buddy to help you fight through the days when you’re “just not feeling it.” Of course, be mindful and listen to your body. If you have a fever or your body feels achy, you may want to skip your workout and give your body time to rest. After all, it’s all about living and feeling better.

http://www.mimichatter.com/5-reasons-you-shouldnt-skip-the-gym-1327026706.html