This is Helen Fisher, the chief science adviser for Match.com and an anthropologist who specializes in ~love~.
Every year, Helen Fisher, Ph.D., conducts a comprehensive study of singles’ attitudes toward dating and sex that surveys over 5,000 Americans. The people surveyed are NOT Match.com members, but are representative of the U.S. population at large. “We queried a representative sample of blacks, whites, Asians and Latinos, young and older, and gays, lesbians and straights from every part of the country and every walk of life,” she told BuzzFeed Science.
The data reveal a number of myths about dating, love, and sex. Here are some common myths about love that could use some debunking:
1. Myth: If you initially don’t find someone attractive, you will never fall in love with them.
Reality: 43% of singles have fallen in love with someone they did not initially find attractive.
2. Myth: Partners are curious about your ex early on.
Reality: 72% of singles do not want to hear about your past relationships while on a date.
3. Myth: Singles rarely think long term on a first date.
Reality: 51% of men and 49% of women have imagined a future together while on the first date.
4. Myth: Romantic love is always triggered by physical attraction first.
Reality: 54% of singles say they fell in love with someone they didn’t initially find attractive after a great conversation, or when they found they had a lot of common interests.
5. Myth: Love at first sight only exists in the movies.
Reality: 34% of singles (41% of men, 29% of women) have experienced love at first sight, while 53% of singles believe in it (59% of men, 49% of women).
6. Myth: Intense, passionate, romantic love lasts no more than a few months.
Reality: 28% of singles surveyed were intensely in love with their last partner for two to five years, 9% of singles were intensely in love with their last partner for six to ten years, and 18% of singles were intensely in love with their last partner for more than 10 years.
7. Myth: To singles, getting married shows that you really love someone.
Reality: 53% of singles don’t want to get married because they believe that you don’t need marriage to prove you love someone.
8. Myth: Single men want more nights out with friends than women do.
Reality: Single men are less likely to consider regular nights out with the guys/girls a “must-have” or “very important” (only 55% of men consider it important while 64% of women find it important).
9. Myth: Men like being single.
Reality: Only 12% of single men reported that they don’t want a relationship and would prefer to stay unattached.
10. Myth: Men are turned off by a successful woman.
Reality: 87% of single men would date a woman who makes considerably more money, and 44% of single men think it’s important to date someone who has a successful career.
11. Myth: Men are uncomfortable when a woman asks them out.
Reality: 90% of men are comfortable if/when a woman asks them out.
12. Myth: Men feel that proposing marriage is always the man’s job.
Reality: 67% of men would be comfortable if a female partner proposed to them.
13. Myth: Men don’t put in much prep time before a date.
Reality: 69% of single men take between 30 minutes and one hour to prepare for a date (vs. 73% of women).
14. Myth: Men don’t want to date smarter women.
Reality: 87% of single men would date a woman who is more intellectual than themselves, and 87% would date a woman who is considerably more educated.
15. Myth: Women want to move in together with a new partner sooner than men do.
Reality: 11% of single men want to live together before six months of dating (vs. 4% of women).
16. Myth: Singles without children avoid dating single parents with children.
Reality: 60% of singles (64% of men, 57% of women) are willing to date a single parent who is living with children.